All of Eternity

This past wednesday was the kick-off for the Mission's Impact Conference at Parkwood Baptist Church in Gastonia, North Carolina.  It was a great night of worship and hearing stories from a church planter working in AZ and also a fellow missionary working in West Africa.  We really enjoyed the entire of week of getting together with folks at Parkwood...there was lots of great food, wonderful times of fellowship and we especially enjoyed the emphasis on prayer weaved through every event.  But during the worship time on wednesday I (Crystal) had such a wonderful time worshiping the Lord.  I had this selfish conversation with God afterwards that went something like this--- "Lord I really don't want to go back to the field because I wish I could spend every Sunday worshipping you like this...in my heart language, with a wonderful full choir, great worship band and meaningful worship songs---Oh How great that would be"  Knowing that our time is coming to an end Stateside and so would be the familiar style of worship, my heart sunk in sadness a little.

Now don't get me wrong, it is a moving thing to witness others worshiping in their own heart language, it often moves me to tears and its one of the reasons I am a missionary to bring the gospel to people without hope and give them the joy and privilege of worshiping the one true KING.  It is rewarding to witness that worship occur and transform others lives...but for me personally its a struggle to deeply worship the Lord in a second language- there is just a part of my mind that I can't turn off that is translating or trying to figure out nuances of that language or I notice the different style of worship (i.e.  the people group not being concerned with being off key or off beat or the sound system so loud that its blasting through my soul...LOL) It short I'm easily distracted from worshiping while doing it in a second language...hopefully this will change as the years progress.  But for now I appreciate and praise the Lord with thanksgiving for having the opportunity to be apart of others worship, its hard myself to connect to the Lord in worship on the same level that I can in my own heart language that is seeming prefect in harmony and motion.

But then the Lord gently and quietly reminded me that I had all of eternity to worship Him in a much deeper and connected way.  That my task was to be about His work for me here and there was still much work needed to be done.

Please don't read into this, I'm not trying to belittle differing worship styles or people's regular access to worship or make board sweeping statements on worship.  I know that missions exist because worship of the One True God does not.  I simply wanted to share with you a moment when God reminded me of the path of obedience He has asked me to walk and the humbling and exciting reminder that I will have all of eternity to praise Him when His purpose for my life is completed.  It helped turn a sad/grieving moment about going back to the field and missing such wonderful worship experiences into an empowered/joy-filled moment for me in regards to my calling from the Lord.